By: Ali Reff

Girl Bosses: We all know them. We all love them. We all secretly (and not-so-secretly) want to be them. It’s a way of life for some, and for others, it’s a baller hashtag to use after crushing a day at the office. With a millennial culture geared towards encouraging women to reach higher and push harder, the “dream” of becoming a girl boss is now more attainable than ever. 

Having started a women’s online clothing and gift store, let me tell you—I read the books. I dreamed the dream. I quit the full-time job and I became the girl boss I hoped I would one day be. And along the way, I’ve discovered a thing or two about entrepreneurship.

1. If you build it, they may not come. And that’s totally cool. 

When starting your own business, a launch can go one of two ways: You build it and everyone comes running, or you build it and wonder if everyone got lost. My business requires seasonal updates of new products, and I can specifically recall a launch where I felt like I was standing out in my own field of dreams, waiting for the DJ to turn on the mic because my customers must not have heard me! I loved my products.

IN EVERY SHORTCOMING THERE IS A LESSON TO BE LEARNED. THE KEY IS TO PUSH ASIDE THAT BRUISED EGO, IDENTIFY WHAT YOU CAN DO BETTER, AND KEEP GOING.

I worked endless hours. Everything on my end was perfect. But then the panic of making my first big mistake as a business owner instantly set in, and I questioned all of my choices.

Little did I know, these moments are actually the most valuable if you want to be a boss babe. Those moments provide the time to take a step back and reflect on why you’re not an overnight success. Maybe your product is perfect for a niche audience, but your marketing channels aren’t reaching the right people. Maybe you’re priced too high compared to your competition. Maybe you need to demonstrate the value of customers choosing you over the big guys.

Every story is different, but behind every shortcoming there is a lesson to be learned. The key is to push aside that bruised ego, identify what you can do better, and keep going.Because it really is totally cool to fail if it pushes you to grow.

2. Don’t compare your hustle to their highlight reel. 

This is a quote from the true girl boss herself, Sophia Amuroso, founder of Nasty Gal and author of the book (you guessed it) “#Girlboss.” If you ask me, truer words have not been spoken. While there are so many upsides to social media, it can also be a constant source of comparison when it comes to building a business. Connecting with your ideal customer at the right time, in the right place, and in the right way can be a game of trial and error when first starting a company. In an Instagram and Pinterest-run world, we all want images that reflect the beauty of what we’re selling, what we’re doing, and who we are. But beautiful images don’t just happen.

That picture of a bright, magazine-worthy office space you see on Instagram? I’m willing to bet that outside of the frame are papers strewn about, coffee cups stacked on coffee cups, and a worker bee more consumed with next month’s finances than with desk perfection. That confetti-blowing post by your favorite company celebrating their 100,000th sale? Beyond figuring out how to get confetti to flutter beautifully on video (which should be an article in and of itself), there was a time where they were figuring out how to make it to their 10th sale.

You will get there. You will have highlights in the form of glorious days when your business is rocking, and your social media feeds are perfectly groomed to make it look like it was a breeze. And you will have days filled with so much hustle, so much chaos, so much imperfection, that you will wonder if it’s all worth it. Spoiler alert: it is. But be wary of comparing the two—It’s the hustle that makes the highlights that much sweeter. 

3. It’s OK to be vulnerable about your journey. 

Ever been to a party where you feel like all you’re being asked is, “How’s [insert new thing in your life] going?” and your initial reaction is to talk about its fabulousness when in reality it has been downright hard?Welcome to life as a girl boss.

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