A chainsaw, lightning rods and one devious plan after the other.  In my dreams, these are typical tools needed when dealing with my competitors.  I’ll show you who’s going to get to market first with that service!  And take that for undercutting my price! 

Outside of dreamland, I’m not so Freddie Kruger-like.  Buuuuutt…let’s just say these roots of kill-or-be-killed lie somewhere deep inside of me, as I’m sure they do with anyone who’s ever been an athlete, business owner, professional or parent.

So, what do we do to deal with this thing?

We get to know our competitors.  We learn about what makes them tick, why they succeed and why they fail.  We know where they are in the marketplace and, most importantly, we know exactly what it is that makes us so different. All so we can put this feeling to rest and know we can outsmart them by knowing them.

But knowing your competition is different than knowing your competition.

Have you ever talked to your competitors?  And no, I don’t mean your intern secret shopping them to get their pricing or you commenting on their social media posts to play nice.  I mean really talked to them?  Have you sat down for coffee, looked in their eyes and had a conversation with them?

What would happen if you, you know…actually developed a friendship with them?

Meet Jane.

Jane runs another business membership group just like me.  Despite the handful of recommendations I received to connect with her years ago, I avoided her like I avoid folding the laundry.  Not only was she competition, but she was competition who did what I did BIGGER, (seemingly) BETTER and for a lot LONGER.  They were the Goliath.

Just imagine if you, the David of this story, walked into a meeting with your Jane – the Goliath: your cards held close to your chest and your smile attempting to hide the mix of self consciousness and arrogance that scream for you to keep a healthy distance so you could win this battle!

But then, something happens…you begin to like Jane.  

Like, really like her.  She’s funny, brilliant and endearing and you want to stay and talk with her for hours.  By the end, you are laughing together and talking openly about the commonalities of your companies.  Stories that only folks who run the same kind of business would really understand.  You realized how much you crave a peer.

Sure, there was a little fear in your belly when you ended your conversation with an invitation to mastermind together.  Can you trust her? How much about your business should you divulge? Would she even want to mastermind with you?  

Without hesitation, Jane’s eyes grow wide and she yells “Yes!”

Sleeping with the enemy….

For 3 years now, Jane and I have met regularly to discuss business issues, challenges and ideas.  In her, I have found a person with decades of experience and wisdom to share.  She’s happily handed me organizational tools that I had yet to develop, given me insight to how she’s handled challenging situations and connected me to resources that would be completely unavailable for anyone not affiliated with the Goliath group.

In me, she has found someone with a fresh approach to the way things have always been done.  I’ve helped her see new ways of providing services, suggested unique ways for approaching her board and given her advice on the digital revolution.

And the best part? She’s become a very dear friend.

C’mon, Katie. This is a special scenario. This can’t be the norm.

But that’s the whole point: it can be the norm.  You absolutely can meet with all your competitors and start the conversation.  It’s all up to your attitude and your intuition.  As you meet with your competitors, are you going to sit down with some jerks who make your stomach knot? Of course.

Are you going to meet with people who promise a lot, but never follow through?  Yes.  And you’re smart to follow your gut and stay as tight-lipped about your company as you feel you should.  But I believe these folks are overshadowed by your competitors who are good people, passionate about what they do and simply want to do better.

When you see your competitors as potential collaborators, a whole new world of business opens up.  When you live with the belief that there is plenty of business to go around, suddenly those enemies turn into resources that can explode with…well, with whatever you want them to explode with: introductions to the exact right people, new business, advice that saves you time and money.

What about you?  What experiences have you had with your competitors? Share your stories (good and bad) below and let’s keep the conversation going!